Fire Emblem If: The Decision
by FellTactician
Summary: My take on the big game changing decision in the future Fire Emblem If game. In this story, Kamui is a girl.


"Brother…" I whisper, my voice trembling at the new revelation, and I have to physically force myself from running into the arms of the man that, once upon a time ago, had been my older brother. The tall man is staring at me with pleading eyes, his sword held low as his free hand is held out to me, his little sister.

"Over here!" Ryouma calls out, and even though his hand is held out for the me to take, his sword crackles with blue electricity, ready to fight at a moments notice.

I take a step forward, causing life to explode in my older brother's eyes as a hopeful expression crosses his face, and then I retract the step.

"Little sister!" The short red haired girl calls from beside Ryouma, and I feel my heart shatter as I look into her eyes and see her stare directly at me, not at her sister, but at the monster that has taken her place. Her older sister is standing behind her, lance held in a firm grip as she passively watches the scene unfold before her, while a new face follows from her right, a bow clutched tightly in his hands as he watches the scene with shaky hands.

"Kamui!" A voice calls from behind me, drawing my attention away from my newly found family and over to the family that I know and love, the one that has been raising me for the past few years. My older brother Marx is sitting on his horse, his sword pointed up to the sky, no longer glowing the malevolent purple that it was moments ago.

"Return to us." He commands, clutching his hand over his heart, a motion that me and him have to many times in the past, a sign of our familial love. He then holds out his hand to me, the same way that Ryouma is silently begging for me to take his hand, a look of hurt plastered onto his normally stoic and emotionless face.

"Big sis!" A new voice calls from my left. I look over and see my little sister running over to me, her healing staff held tightly in her small hands, with a relieved look on her face. Next to her is my older brother and my older sister, Camilla. My brother is holding onto a dark purple magic tome, one that allows him to focus his magic into physical form, while my sister has long since abandoned her battle axe, choosing instead to depart from her wyvern to follow her siblings.

I take a step towards them, then step back.

_Oh gods… W-who do I go with?_ I think to myself as I look back and forth between the two groups, my actual family to the right side of me and my adoptive family to my left. The one that I barely know, having been away from them since birth, and the one that I have grown up with, forming a bond that would shatter at a single betrayal.

"Damn it, Kamui!" Ryouma shouts, his hand still outstretched but now curled into a fist as his blade crackles dangerously, his eyes narrowing at the man sitting on the horse across from him. "We're your family! Your real family! Don't you care?!"

I fall down to my knees in pain, unable to choose a family to fight with, and I let out a scream as I bury my face in the dirt, trying to block out all sources of light while I cover my ears tightly, trying to block out the sounds of both families trying to win me over.

I can feel all three of my big sisters eyes on me, all of them filled with sorrow and sympathy at the choice that I've been presented. I feel the strange archers eyes on me as well, confusion spreading through his body as he tries to figure something out. There are my three older brother's, all watching me with calm and collected eyes, not wanting to force me into something that I don't want to do, but willing to do anything to get their brother back.

And finally, there is my little sister. The girl that I helped raise from birth, the one that I always gave a stolen dessert to when she was sad, the girl that always tried to make me smile when I was scared. The one that I got into fights with over the stupidest things, and the one that I got into my first fight over, trying to protect her.

"Kamui…" Marx says, his voice tired and filled with a mixture of sadness, rage, and love. "…the choice is yours. We will not judge for whose side you take, but there is still the law about dealing with traitors… and you know it is not a kind one."

"Big sister?" My little sister asks, her tone filled with fear and her eyes brimming over with tears.

I pick my head up off of the ground and look at both sides once more. I look over at Ryouma, whose face is now filled with anguish, then my sisters and the archer, who are all dealing with the same emotions. Then I look at Marx, whose face is soft and surprisingly vulnerable for once. Then my sisters and brother, who are wearing small smiles, though whether they are forced or not is something I can't tell.

I pick myself up, shakily using my sword as leverage to try and avoid falling over. Once I am satisfied that I can stand up without falling on my ass, I walk forward slightly, not in either direction, before I stop. I just stand there for what feels like forever, though in reality it's only been a few minutes, before I notice the break in silence around me.

Ryouma is charging forward, both hands on his katana, causing the blade to glow brightly with blue lightning, towards Marx, who is riding forward while his sword glows that malevolent purple once again.

I charge forward in between them, forcing Marx's horse to rear up on it's hind legs and whinny loudly while Ryouma slides to a stop, throwing his arms around wildly to try and keep his balance. Both of them stare at me as if I've gone mad, though they make no intention of attacking each other any further.

"Kamui?" They ask simultaneously, their faces morphing into masks of confusion.

I turn to face Marx, a sad smile on my face. I reach a hand out to him, which he instantly takes, his calm and gentle smile transforming into a concerned frown.

"Marx…" I begin slowly, trying my hardest to keep my breath even and not burst into a fit of tears. "Thank you. For everything. For being there every step of the way in my life when I had no one else to turn to, for being the kind big brother that I've always known you to be…"

Marx is silent as his face falls, his frown becoming deeper as his hand tightens around mine, but he says nothing as he stares at the ground below his horse.

I turn to face Ryouma, who has a hopeful expression as he reaches out to grab my hand before I have a chance to extend it to him, and I finally burst into tears, the salty depression running down my cheeks feeling like fire against my pale skin.

"Ryouma, I'm so sorry…" I apologize, forcing him to adopt a confused expression at my words, before realization strikes and his face falls as well, the katana in his other hand clattering to the ground as a deep sigh bursts free from his chest. "Please forgive me."

"There is nothing to forgive, child." Ryouma says sadly, releasing my hand only to wrap his arms around my petite frame, his much larger body easily overwhelming my own. Even though I can't see his face, I can feel his body heaving with silent sobs, his face buried in the silver locks that run down my back.

I can feel Marx's hand squeezing mine reassuringly, content to extending a momentary truce towards the enemy general as I cry my depression into my older brother's armor bound chest. Even though I barely know this man, I feel my heart break with the decision I am about to make, very well knowing what it will do to him.

After standing there for a while, waiting for the tears to stop and become sticky on my cheeks as they dry, Ryouma finally releases me from the hug, leaving me feeling suddenly very cold and empty, but it soon disappears as Marx envelops me in a hug from behind.

Ryouma begins walking away from us, but not before stooping down to pick up his katana. He makes a few long strides, already a fair amount of distance away from us, before he pauses and throws a glance over his shoulder.

"Sokumen o anata ga erabu jūyōde wanai. Watashi no kichōna imōto tsunenidearu." Is all Ryouma says before he continues back to walking, waving away the soldiers that have gathered us and motioning for his family to follow him.

"Come, Kamui. Let's return home." Marx says as he turns me around and pushes me into the direction of my sisters and brother.

The whole ride back home is quiet and uneventful. I chose to ride with Camilla, enjoying the feeling of riding on top of her wyvern mount while feeling her hold onto my body tightly around the waist, ensuring that I don't fall into a steep plummet to my death.

"Hey Kamui?" Camilla asks as she places her chin on my shoulder, her lavender hair flowing wildly behind her as the massive beast below us carries us across the sky. "What was the last thing that Ryouma said?"

I'm quiet for a moment. At first, I don't really feel like answering, content on just letting his last words to me just sit untainted in my head, even though I have a rough time translating them myself. Then, when I feel Camilla pull her head away, I lean back, letting my head rest against her chest as I stare into the sky ahead of us.

_"__It doesn't matter whose side you choose. You will always be my precious little sister." Ryouma says in japanese while looking back at me, a small trace of hurt and betrayal in his eyes, before he turns and walks off, leaving me alone with my older brother._


End file.
